More manna from heaven

Filed under: , , by: Stankoniforous 0ne

God must truly be smiling on Kansas right now.  First, Chiefs GM Pioli grabs Matt Cassel as the Chiefs starting quarterback.  Then Broncos QB gets in his feelings about almost being dealt for Cassel and forces his way out of town.  Lastly, the lowly Royals are seemingly in the start of an uptick.  Now Xavier Henry, the #1 rated high school basketball player, wants to sign with Kansas after de-committing to Memphis due to Calipari movin to Kentucky. 

So Coach Self, gift baskets are in order.  To John Calipari for blowing up a truly one of a kind class that Memphis was expecting.  Henry and Tyreke Evans in the same backcourt?  That would be scary.  Assuming that Evans doesn't got in the draft. 

To add insult to injury, Henry's brother, a walk-on at Memphis, wants to transfer to Kansas to play with his brother.  All this comes via Henry's father. 

So Kansas can reload while bringing back everyone from the Sweet 16 team this year. 

So again thank you John Calipari for gift wrapping another guard for the Jayhawks.  Much obliged homey.



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The Draft

Filed under: , by: Anonymous

Also known as the NFL draft. I work too much to go position by position and team by team. With the attention that QBs are drawing right now, it's the perfect time to analyze the QBs in the draft. Let's start with the biggest name in the draft.

Matthew Stafford

(+)'s: Clearly the best arm in the this class. Having watched a few Georgia Bulldogs games last year, Stafford had an arm that could excite. I wouldn't quite say he has a JaMarcus Russell-type arm but he's not too shabby. As "experts" like to say, can make all the throws. Game experience. He is seen to have franchise QB potential.

(-)'s: Not terribly mobile. He could shuffle a lil bit in the pocket but didn't show an amazing ability to keep broken plays alive sufficiently long enough. Decisionmaking needs work. Didn't seem to stand up to well in the face of the blitz and different coverages seemed to confuse him a bit too easily.

Projected: 1st round, 1st pick. First QB taken in the draft.

QB most similar to:...Based on his physical gifts I would say Matt Ryan. Stank-0 was not terribly sold on Ryan when he was drafted last year, and I feel the same way about Stafford. Scouts are droolin all over this kid.

I will give the rest of the writers a chance to evaluate the other QBs in this year's draft.

P.S. I had to change the name. Stank-0 informed me with SPS comin on board that's alot of S-names on the roster. So now I am Werdsworth...no Punchline.

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Mile High? City of Wind!

Filed under: , , by: Anonymous

What a move! The Bears D has been carrying the Bears for a very long time. PTI is already thinking Super Bowl. Slow ya flow, playa.

This is a very good move. I thought he would end up in the wasteland of Detroit, but the Chi? That's a whole 'nother move. The Bears D only need a game manager, but Jay is more than a manager. He can put the offense in the place to score alot of points. Combine that with the D and they can go places. They have jumped to the head of the NFC North in a big way. The Vikes were in the driver seat but QB play was holding them back, while wasting Purple Jesus aka AD's prime.

Lookin on other side...the Broncos got Kyle Orton and two 1st round picks in return, 2009 and 2010. Kyle Orton, really? I guess that makes sense because no one is goin to be willing to take Turnoversaurus Rex. Kyle got the arm but nowhere near what Jay has. Orton did progress last season. He was making some great throws.

Here's the Bears offense problem. They don't have the weapons that Jay is used to in Denver. Good thing the draft is comin up.

I also don't buy that the Broncos can find a franchise QB through the draft. Drafting a QB is a very hit-or-miss proposition. I guess the Stankoniforous Files fam will have to rate the QBs in the upcoming draft.

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Allow me to reintroduce myself....

Filed under: by: SPS

Greetings All.

I am S. PS a sports fan with an immense IT background and a decent bit of comedy. I have been blessed with the chance to contribute to the STANKONIFOROUS files, by the Great Stank-O so I will do that STANKY-LEG and join in......

I will have more to say soon, but I just had to get the introductory particulars out there.

Thanks for reading and be on the lookout for more from me in the future

S dot.....

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Headliners for March

Filed under: by: Stankoniforous 0ne

T.O. obviously made serious waves for the month of March, just by finding a new team so quickly after being let go by the Cowboys.

The Big East for making history.

Jay Cutler for becoming the newest NFL diva...and forcing the Broncos to trade a franchise QB in the uptick of his career.

Josh McDaniel for tankin a NFL season before training camp even begins.

Syracuse and UConn for the 2nd longest game in NCAA history...UNC for living up the Barack's bracket.

Nova for the best game to date in the Dance.

Officer Powell for the worst timing possible. Stank-0 hopes you have a plan B, no not the pill or the tactic that the Practice used, but another idea to put food on your table and butter your bread, playa.








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Manna from heaven!

Filed under: , , , , by: Stankoniforous 0ne



Stank-0 is a bit shocked, but the Broncos are seriously thinkin of dealing Jay-C aka Jay-Hova [shout out to Ed for the new nickname]

Never in this Chiefs' fan wildest dreams did he think the Broncos would seriously deal this guy.  He's only 25 and threw for 4500 yards and 25 TDs.  Um...those guys don't exactly grow on trees, ya know?  To finish that factoid, only two other QBs matched those numbers:  Drew Brees and Kurt Warner. 

Now Stank-0 will make no qualms about it, he's completely selfish about this.  If the division were a person, it would be a babe wrapped in swaddling clothes in a basin in front of a convent.  Anyone that is able just has to dress, feed, and care for the babe and it's all yours.  That my friends is the AFC West today.  Right now. 

Stank-0 has to say things are lookin up for the Kansas City teams right now.  The Royals have been givin a dark horse's chance at the AL Central and AFC West is primed for the taking for the Chiefs.  *On his knees thankin the Good Lord* 






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Everything that glitters....

Filed under: , , by: Anonymous

So Calipari is considering the Kentucky coaching job. This one is a no brainer. Billy G got fired after two seasons, they missed the Dance for the first time in 17 years, the fanbase has unreal expectations, and they don't have the talent they used to have.

How is this decision that difficult? At Memphis, Calipari can become the winningest coach in men's college basketball. He could average 30 win seasons, Conference USA is Memphis' to lose every single year, and they get great recruits because they only really battle UTenn for players.

In Kentucky, he's gonna be fighting with former UK coach and future HOFer Rick Pitino. Yes, Kentucky is a storied program but it's not what it used to be. We at Stankoniforous Files are fond of giving unwanted free advice but this time I want to seriously help Calipari. Stay where you are.

In about 4-5 more seasons, Memphis will be a name program as well. Just work on keepin your freshman past a single year and you are on your way. Thank me later.

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When wearing a badge creates problems

Filed under: , , by: Stankoniforous 0ne

By now you have to have heard about Ryan Moats encounter with the police.  At the time, Stank-0 stated that homey was toast, just on the strength of him deciding that Moats' "behavior" warranted a lecture.  Add in a dying relative.  Curtains.  Ether.  *Playin Taps*  Little did Stank-0 realize how big this would get.  All because of a little thing called a dashcam.  If not for it, it would Moats' word vs. the officer's.  Infinitely more dismissible. 

Now word comes down that Zach Thomas' wife had a run-in with the very same officer.  She was cuffed and detained for 3 hours.  This is on a whole other level.  This is a white woman and the wife of a professional football player in the state of Texas, the Cowboys no less.  She received 5 tickets.  Clearly this officer (his last name is Powell) has some abuse of power issues.   

Now Officer Powell is writing apologies and making statements tryin to save that job since they are hard to come by in this economy.  Stank-0 could see him being blacklisted if he loses his job or even if he keeps it. 

Word of advice for other officers with similar issues: turn the dashcam off.  Uh...Stank-0 thinks that cam has to be on during a traffic stop sooooo.... never mind.  This could have ended in about 2 minutes.  Let's rerun the scenario. 

Officer Powell:  Sir, why did you run the red light? 
Moats:  My mother-in-law is near death so we came....
Powell:  Son, go see her.  Sorry to bother you in your time of need. 
*End*

Was it really that hard to ask a question or two?  Stank-0 says, Off with his head!  What say you ? 



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Final 4!!!

Filed under: , by: Stankoniforous 0ne

AP Photo/Darron Cummings

Ain't this somethin!?  L'ville did not make it!  Again maybe M0yo was right in saying they hadn't played anyone.  Maybe Mich St. is on a mission. 

BGreazy did his thug thizzle, but OU did not.  UNC is Final 4 bound!  Griff still got his numbers but the Sooners started out too flat and UNC jumped on them and didn't let up.  Eerily similar to last year...except the J-Hawks were the ones doing the jumpin on. 

So Michigan St. clashes with UConn and the Huskies have won the title at 5 year intervals the last ring was in 2004, and the previous ring was 1999.  Stank-0's money is on the Huskies to slip past the Spartans. 

Nova and UNC clash on the other side of the bracket.  UNC will advance.  Nova doesn't have the bodies inside to deal with Tyler H.  That creates the inside-out offense that will allow Lawson and nem to penetrate into the lane.

We will have a big man heavy title game.  Hashim Thabeet vs. Tyler H.  Ratings bonanza! 

Stank-0 will wait until they actually play the games, to make his National Championship game prediction. 



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